Thursday, December 25, 2008

goodbye.

dear all:
I'm leaving in a few hours (that is, approximately three). I hope that I get to see you when I come home again.
In any case, I hope you had a wonderful Christmas Day.
I also hope that you enjoy whatever family or friend involved goings-on you have planned for the Christmas and New Year's season.
That's all I wanted to say to you.

From, Nadine

Monday, December 22, 2008

I like to think that I have an exceptionally expressive face.
.
And, you know what? Maybe that's not true, but I think that might be okay with me. Even so, I sure like to think it all the same.
.
.
By the way, today I don't feel like going to sleep, even though I am excessively fatigued.

Thursday, December 18, 2008

sometimes it is funny, even if I don't laugh.

You know what I've learned lately? A few things about one thing actually. Well, sort of.

Sometimes people tease you and you get really mad.

Sometimes people tease you and you get mad but you don't really know why because what they're saying is kind of true.

Sometimes people tease you and you're actually kind of glad that they noticed something in order to tease you about it, even though it makes you blush. It just seems lame at the time to say that you're glad they noticed, especially after they took the time and effort to think up a good tease.

Sometimes people tease you and you think you should be more mad than you are and maybe that makes you act in a certain way.

Sometimes people are able to tease you because they know you really well. That's a delightful way to think of it.

Sometimes people tease you and it's really not so bad as you think it is. Especially when it's something that kind of makes you at least as happy as it makes you embarassed.


P.S. By "you" I actually mean "me". I know, very tricky.

Tuesday, December 09, 2008

eyelash+cheek=happy

You know those times when you're smiling so hugely that you can feel your eyelashes on your cheeks?

It's one of the nicest feelings in the world.

Sunday, December 07, 2008

dear future hypothetical boyfriend:
When we get together, let's do things like go for walks, even in winter because wintry walks are often the prettiest. Or let's watch a movie at one of our houses and then talk through it, because movies can't contain all of my attention, unless it's a very interesting or suspenseful movie, in which case I'll probably be asking you what's happening because I will probably have missed some critical occurence in the story as I am easily distracted.
In any case, let's spend time doing things together and enjoying each other's existence and sometimes each other's silence, because silence is a beautiful gift.

dear all:
I want to see you soon.

Tuesday, December 02, 2008

something you may not have known about me...

I really like buttons.

Also, it has been a long-time ambition of mine to buy a coat and put several buttons on it.

Yesterday I bought a coat.

Today I put buttons on it.

Button-putting-on is going to be a gradual thing...although I did put a lot on today, I'm going to slowly put more and more buttons on my coat until I want to stop or until the majority of the fabric is covered in buttons, which ever comes first.

In any case, ask me to show you sometime, please? Although, if you see me and ask me, you probably won't really need to ask anymore [as I will almost definitely be wearing said coat with buttons on it]. Well, you can just pretend you didn't see yet...just say you were temporarily blind.

I'm rather ridiculously excited about it. It may even be scandalous to be as excited as I am at this moment.


P.S. If you ever want to get me a gift, get a fabulously beautiful button. For example, one in the shape of a rubber duck.

Sunday, November 30, 2008

I'm havin' a thought here, Barbossa...

Here's something I find immensely interesting:

You know how you do your hair in the morning (or whenever else you do your hair...) and you always part it on the same side, and you look in the mirror and there it is! on that side. But then, you look at a picture of yourself from the same day and there it is! that part of yours is on the other side. I find it immensely interesting that I think I look ridiculous in pictures with my part on the other side, but in the mirror it looks pretty okay.

Maybe I should try parting my hair on the other side...just for interest's sake, you know?

Friday, November 28, 2008

this is a total of three grandiose things.

Breaking news:

MOM. MADE. JAM!

Aaaaaand!

MOM. MADE. CROQUETTE. GOOP!

One more thing!

MOM. IS. WONDERFUL!

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

collect bookoo bucks!

Addendum:
Donuts are very very sugary...especially when you haven't had one in approximately four or five months. Now I remember why I don't like them.

Thursday, November 20, 2008

finding enjoyment

I enjoy the fact that I can sit inside on a snowy day next to the wood stove with my cat and drink tea.

I enjoy the fact that I can be sorry and you can forgive me.

I enjoy the fact that I can speak with my minister and he understands me and doesn't pretend that he knows everything; he speaks back as another sinful human being who struggles just like me.

I enjoy the fact that I can write letters with people and still get replies back, even though we are in the supposed "Technology Age" or something.

I enjoy the fact that I don't know everything because it means there is still so much more to learn.

I enjoy the fact that my family really likes music, because I am a part of it and I can partake in that music and almost live to the beat.

I enjoy the fact that on the bus at school I draw pictures and write words on my binder because other people look at what I'm writing and drawing and think about it.

I enjoy the fact that I am never finished my 'To Do' List because it means I should never be bored.

I enjoy the fact that I day-dream because it makes me laugh.

I enjoy the fact that I am able to learn because it means I will try.

I enjoy the fact that music exists so I can hear it and love it.

I enjoy the fact that sometimes I just sit and be happy that I exist.

I enjoy the fact that I can speak because it means I can convey thoughts to others...sometimes.

I enjoy the fact that I can still be bored, sometimes bored is a great place to be.

I enjoy the fact that I can feel my cat on my legs because it means that we are real.

I enjoy the fact that I can wake up in the morning and feel terrified and my heart is beating far faster than normal and I am curled into a ball and I glance around my room in fear because it means I have an imagination and that I dream.

I enjoy the fact that I have a family and I know them.

I enjoy the fact that I am light-hearted because it means that I laugh a lot.

I enjoy the fact that my eyes change colour because I can check them every morning and have a surprise.

I enjoy the fact that one of the buttons is falling off my coat because it means I'll get to fix it soon.

I enjoy the fact that I exist because it means I can see people, and talk to them, and feel their presence, and be with them.

I enjoy the fact that I have eyes because I can see the beautiful colours of God's creation.

I enjoy the fact that things exist that I don't necessarily like because I can be taught to appreciate them even though I don't like them.

I enjoy the fact that there are words I don't know so that I look them up in a dictionary.

I enjoy the fact that there are tomorrows and todays and yesterdays.

I enjoy the fact that I love my family [cousins (honorary and unavoidable), aunts (honorary and unavoidable), uncles (honorary and unavoidable), nieces, sisters, parents, grandparents included] because it means I can spend time with them and enjoy that they exist and that we coexist.

I enjoy the fact that there are people I look up to and can look up to.

I enjoy the fact that there is tea for cold, snowy mornings.

I enjoy the fact that people make sounds and that I can see it as sound, not just noise.

I enjoy the fact that sometimes jokes go way over my head and I think about them later (a lot later) and I finally understand them and then I laugh very hard.

I enjoy the fact that people recognize you even if you change your hair colour.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

hoping for no grumpiness in the morning...maybe?

I've done all I can here.

Bed time. woo!

Monday, November 17, 2008

no punctuation

this morning when I woke up I looked at my bedroom wall and was filled with an urge to rip off all the pictures and texts that cover it

im not sure why this was

Thursday, November 13, 2008

grey eyes today.

Today I have no hairspray in my hair. Zero. Zippo. None. Nil. Zilch.
I kind of like it.
My hair feels soft and it's not crunchy at all......I may have to do this again sometime.

Hooray for no hair products!

Sunday, November 09, 2008

whattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattododwhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodoprayerlife=virtuallynonexistentwhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodowhattodo

Thursday, November 06, 2008

devote yourselves to prayer

de⋅vote /dɪˈvoʊt/ [di-voht]
–verb (used with object), -vot⋅ed, -vot⋅ing.
1. to give up or appropriate to or concentrate on a particular pursuit, occupation, purpose, cause, etc.: to devote one's time to reading.
2. to appropriate by or as if by a vow; set apart or dedicate by a solemn or formal act; consecrate: She devoted her life to God.

prayer /prɛər/ [prair]
–noun
1. a devout petition to God or an object of worship.
2. a spiritual communion with God or an object of worship, as in supplication, thanksgiving, adoration, or confession.
3. the act or practice of praying to God or an object of worship.
4. a formula or sequence of words used in or appointed for praying: the Lord's Prayer.
5. prayers, a religious observance, either public or private, consisting wholly or mainly of prayer.
6. that which is prayed for.
7. a petition; entreaty.


This is what I'm thinking about.
And how I'm faithfully failing at it.

Sunday, November 02, 2008

much thinking is being done.

what about?




you probably shouldn't ask.

Monday, October 27, 2008

bank tellers are people too.

sometimes I forget.

Today I went to the bank. The bank teller asked if I had an older brother and I hesitantly said, "yes, I have three." Then she asked if one of them was going to Mexico and I, again hesitantly, answered yes. I was in the process of asking how she knew this when she told me that he had been there earlier and she recognized the last name.

In the car, I told Christopher the story. He laughed. I told him that she had just blown my mind. I had forgotten that bank tellers are people too.
They have brains, and livers, too.
Sometimes it feels like Satan is all-powerful, but I think that God lets Satan think that he is gaining the upper hand sometimes, God allows Satan to be "in charge" of a situation before acting himself. Before taking that situation and moulding it.
----
God is a strategist.
He is fighting a battle and He will not lose.

Thursday, October 23, 2008

inexpressible and glorious joy?

"These have come so that your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed. Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, for you are receiving the goal of your faith, the salvation of your souls."
1 Peter 1:7-9
---
Two weeks ago, on a Saturday, I felt closer to GOD than I had in a long time.
---
Now I realize: it was a One Night Stand.

Sunday, October 19, 2008

today my eyes are green

Sometimes, when my brother is playing guitar, I take a glass of milk and two cookies and I go downstairs. I sit in the room next to his on the pull-out couch. I have my pajamas on and I wrap myself up in the blue blanket my eldest sister gave me for Christmas four years ago. And I listen. Sometimes he plays songs that I know and I sing the words softly to myself so he won't know I'm listening. At other times he plays songs I don't know or songs he wrote and I make up my own words or I just listen and soak the music in, it's like I can feel it seeping into the pores of my skin. Sometimes I think about things, lots of things, difficult things. Sometimes he sings and I smile to myself and enjoy the beauty. Sometimes I'm glad I sit alone and I think that I wouldn't enjoy it as much if I had to share it, but that's a lie. I would like to share it with special people. Sometimes I wish I could sit there forever. I think I could be happy if I could sit alone, cuddled in my blanket, eating cookies, drinking milk, listening to my brother for the rest of my life.
-----------------------------
And then he stops and the silence replaces the music and seeps into the pores of my skin. It makes me feel cold and lonely and that is when I wish someone else was there. Someone special who would hold me and let me know that I'm not alone. Sometimes it seems like I can feel GOD's presence in those moments. But yesterday, it felt like He was gone, gone and not coming back.

Thursday, October 16, 2008

water tastes better when it falls from the sky in fast-moving droplets

Monday, October 13, 2008

a new post contains enough excitement for several moments

Why don't nutella jars have flaps on the foil that you have to pull off in order to get to the chocolate-y goodness inside? Are they trying to make it impossible to pull off the foil all in one go? I mean, really, aren't you supposed to make it easy to get at the stuff inside? That's what we're waiting for, that's why we keep buying nutella!

Yeesh, maybe I should file a complaint or something.
That would teach them to make anti-flap foil.

Sunday, October 12, 2008

Jeepers creepers, where'd you get those peepers?


I am very much looking forward to church today. Really and truly.

Thursday, October 09, 2008

So, my brother and I are now staying home this weekend together, instead of going camping with the rest of my family. Sad, eh?

However, now I'll have no distractions to stop me from studying. And that's a good thing.........right?

I just clued in to the fact that I must now forego Thanksgiving dinner! What is that all about!?!?!

Sunday, October 05, 2008

inexpressible and glorious joy

Yesterday I discovered the joy of being where GOD wanted me to be.
It coincided with where I wanted me to be, which made it even more beautiful.

Wednesday, October 01, 2008

I've been thinking about beauty

there's something strangely beautiful and romantic about someone walking alone in the rain,
with her hair sticking to her scalp because of the droplets attacking her,
ignoring the mocking smiles of those who are still perfect, safely huddled under their umbrellas

Monday, September 29, 2008

"How many of you believe in God?
How many of you have met God?"

silence.


a quote from a lecture I sat through this afternoon.

Saturday, September 20, 2008

daydreaming=fantasizing=creepy


girls=failing parking=randomness=walk!=coffee=laughing [at nothing]=so good


Tuesday, September 16, 2008

a friend who sticks like peanut butter... classy song

Psalm 46
For the director of music. Of the Sons of Korah. According to Alamoth. A song.

"God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea, though its waters roar and foam and the mountains quake with their surging. There is a river whose streams make glad the city of God, the holy place where the Most High dwells. God is within her, she will not fall; God will help her at break of day. Nations are in uproar, kingdoms fall; he lifts his voice, the earth melts. The LORD Almighty is with us; the God of Jacob is our fortress. Come and see the works of the LORD, the desolations he has brought on the earth. He makes wars cease to the ends of the earth; he breaks the bow and shatters the spear, he burns the shields with fire.
"Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth." The LORD Almighty is with us; the God of Jacob is our fortress."


The LORD Almighty is with us; the God of Jacob is our fortress.


This was brought to my attention by a friend (and cousin) of mine. It's been sticking with me for a while now.

Saturday, September 06, 2008

today is never just any day.

  • sometimes things aren't what I expect them to be
  • sometimes I am disappointed
  • sometimes I don't appreciate you as much as you deserve
  • sometimes things go exactly as I want them to, but I choose to be angry about them anyways
  • sometimes what God tells me is hard to hear
  • sometimes I have to change
  • sometimes things are meant to be ignored
  • sometimes things happen to change me, or to make me see that I need to change
  • sometimes I require adjustments to my thinking
  • sometimes things are different and I don't notice
  • sometimes people around me change
  • sometimes my relationships morph
  • sometimes I miss how people used to be
  • sometimes my idea of beauty is different than yours
  • sometimes God wants things to be different than I do
  • sometimes my attitude needs adjustment
  • sometimes I miss people and I am full of elation when I see them
  • sometimes I think change has to happen more than it does
  • sometimes I like to listen to everything instead of just what one person is saying to me, their voice sounds more beautiful when accompanied with other peoples' soft, muffled words that I can't quite comprehend, with crickets, with people walking on gravel, with fires burning, with chairs squeaking, with guitar, with background noises
  • sometimes I let background noises speak too loudly and I can't hear what that one person is saying anymore
  • sometimes changes are hard to do
  • sometimes I think I hear someone calling me, but it's not true, and I turn around and I see something beautiful
  • sometimes things don't go according to plan
  • sometimes I think a lot
  • sometimes I miss people, but when I see them I would have much rather not seen them and kept missing them
  • sometimes I hope that people need me
  • sometimes I think too much about me
  • sometimes I need to just stop talking now

Friday, September 05, 2008

school

Sometimes, I think that I see certain people too much, and other people not enough.
But, I wish I could bring the people I don't see enough up to the stage where I see them as much as the people I think I see too much. Without losing any time spent with the people whom I think I see too much.

Sometimes, I think that things make more sense in my head and they are hard to write down.

Sunday, August 24, 2008

sewing fig leaves

the serpent, more crafty than any other creature

did GOD really say

we may eat, except for The Tree in the middle of the garden; we must not touch it for we will die

you will not surely die, you will be like GOD

woman saw the fruit of The Tree, pleasing to the eye, good for food , desirable for gaining wisdom

she took some and ate, she gave to her husband, and he ate

the eyes of them both were opened

man and wife realized they were naked

made coverings of fig leaves for themselves

heard the sound of the LORD GOD walking in the garden

hid from the LORD GOD

where are you

I was afraid because I was naked

who told you; have you eaten from The Tree about which i commanded you

it was the woman whom you gave

what have you done

it was the serpent which you created

to the serpent he said, cursed are you above all creatures; he will crush your head, and you will strike his heel

to the woman he said, i will greatly increase your pains in childbearing; your desire will be for you husband, your husband will rule over you

to adam he said, cursed is the ground because you have done this; it will produce thorns and thistles; for dust you are and to dust you will return

adam named his wife eve

the LORD GOD made coverings of skin, the first sacrifice

the LORD GOD said, man has now become like us, knowing good and evil; he can not be allowed to reach and take from The Tree Of Life and so live forever

so the LORD GOD banished the man and the woman from the garden

after this, the LORD GOD placed a cherubim and a flaming sword on the east side of the garden to guard the way to The Tree Of Life

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

shirkin' your workin'

So...


...camp happened last week.

Friday, August 08, 2008

loud music is beneficial, it keeps you awake.

why'd you have to be so cute? it's impossible to ignore you.
must you make me laugh so much? it's bad enough we get along so well.





P.S. It's from a song by Imogen Heap called Goodnight and Go.
It sure is yellow.



Uh huh, uh huh.
P.S. I'm not working today....AAAAH!!!(that was a wierded out "AAAAH")

Monday, August 04, 2008

maybe it's just satisfaction

Happiness is coming home from work, stripping off the soaking wet socks that have been squidging in your shoes all day, hopping in the shower, scalding yourself from the hot water, putting on a cleeeeeeean new shirt, some cleeeeeean new pants, and some cleeeeeean new socks.

That is happiness. At least it was for today.

Friday, August 01, 2008

aaaaand REPEAT.

Dancing to Vengaboys, We Like To Party is generally an exceptionally good time, even when you are a horrid dancer.


Except when you trip over the cat who is rushing to it's water bowl.

Sunday, July 27, 2008

staples business depot is a good place to find scotch tape

What's stopping you from delving into the WORD?



Thank you to everyone who made yesterday an amazing day.
I had a spectacular time with all of you. :]

Friday, July 25, 2008

I don't even mind being told to go home early. Not one bit.

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

The woman on the side of the road was kind.
She smiled and waved at me even though the muck covering my legs and the disgruntled exhaustion shown on my face weren't very welcoming.

I don't even know her name.



P.S. Amy is coming home TODAY!

Sunday, July 20, 2008

the billionaire who wasn't

I think I want to go thrift-store-ing. And garage-sale-ing.
.
.

Just so I can see all the lovely things that other people don't want anymore,
and I can take them home and love them.
.
.
I think I want to find red shoes..

Friday, July 18, 2008

shoulder to shoulder into the fray

I have decided it is about time I de-pick-ified myself (i.e. made myself less picky).
It's going to be a rather difficult battle, as I am the pickiest person I know. [Sad, eh?]



However, if this means I have to start eating seafood, melons, and 'shrooms, I don't think I can do it.

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Quand j'étais jeune...

When I was young, I used to look at the Nutritional Value table on any article available for consumption and deduce how many of said article available for consumption I would need to consume in order to have 100% of my daily intake of each item on the list from the Nutritional Value table. It often took me a long time to calculate.



Today, I discovered that I still am, very much, the nerd that I always was.

Monday, July 14, 2008

'cause when you're a professional pirate, you don't have to wear a suit

Then:
"I was so shocked at a loss for words and garbling like a ninny."


Now:
"I'm so ecstatic!"

Thursday, July 10, 2008

FIF-Dandelions

Dandelion.
This word always makes me think of someone saying:
"Well isn't that just dan-dy!"
in a certain, cheerful, pleasant sort of voice
and then laughing,
the kind of laugh that would make
a very old man's rotund belly shake
as he held his sides.

Tuesday, July 08, 2008

Dear friend:

I think I miss you.
I hope that we can get together soon so that I can tell you that I really have missed you.
And I can give you a hug.
Sometimes I wish I could send hugs over the internet, but then I remember that they wouldn't be near as good.
We should go out for coffee sometime.
Love, Nadine

Thursday, July 03, 2008

right now.

i dont feel like myself

Tuesday, July 01, 2008

your only comfort = THE only comfort

Quelle est ton unique assurance dans la vie comme dans la mort?

C’est que, dans la vie comme dans la mort, j’appartiens, corps et âme, non pas à moi-même, mais à Jésus-Christ, mon fidèle Sauveur.

(Catéchisme de Heidelberg)



Bible Camp. Should I stay or should I go?

Monday, June 30, 2008

dunh dunh dunh DUUNNHHH! (cue Zelda theme song)

Woot! I don't have to work tomorrow, this is incredible!
I'm excited, but I don't know what to do with myself.


I think that maybe I'll do laundry.

Sunday, June 29, 2008

yo-ho-ho and a bottle of cod liver oil

I am a horrid navigator. :] Sorry Brittni..... heh heh

Also, remember: steady stream. Oh dear...fun stuff, fun stuff.



One more thing, I got a letter on Friday and I'm going to read it after church this morning. Yup. I'm excited.

Friday, June 27, 2008

Other girl has returned! (as of Monday)

...
Except, now she's starting to learn my real name.

Ergo, other girl's time may be short-lived.

Thursday, June 26, 2008

  • I'm tired, but I had a pretty dang swell day today.
  • I decided to start reading the book of Proverbs.
  • I'm a big fan of lists, I don't know why.
  • I went swimming with Dan and Christopher. It was fun. :]
  • I like square brackets. I never use them properly, but they're square and that's what matters. (Especially in math.)
  • I just ate several pickles and each one was delectable.
  • I have very much desire to get a puppy.

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

brilliancy, on the go!

On the way home from work, I observed something humorous.

Someone was trying to be environmentally-friendly by throwing their orange peels out the window. Nice of them, eh? To make everything better, they placed said peels inside a plastic bag.

You people are BRILLIANT!

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Psalm 45:1

my tongue is the pen of a skillful writer.

Think about that before (and while) you speak.

Monday, June 23, 2008

I almost squooshed a snail when I drove to work this morning. Twice.

And, I ate the sticker on my apple.

Saturday, June 21, 2008

What would happen if I soaked my feet in tea?





P.S. I really dislike leaving messages with a machine.

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

It's an interesting point that you make..... And it's true.

"There was never anything to be gained from observing what humans said to one another - language was just there to hide their thoughts."
Terry Pratchett in his book Reaper Man
...
I still like to speak... even if it is to hide my thoughts.

Sunday, June 15, 2008

salt water...UP the nose...on purpose too yet

I learned again yesterday that I need help...with a lot of things that I don't want to admit to.

Friday, June 13, 2008

Looks like a pretty good weekend ahead. I think I'll pitch my tent here.

Sunday, June 08, 2008

much too hasty

I spoke too hastily.
This phrase stood out [for me] from the sermon we received in Flamborough this afternoon.

"never stop trying to look like Jesus"
-Rev. John VanPopta
I don't try very hard, and my efforts are weak.
...Especially considering I don't like to look like anyone but myself.

defective prayer life

It was Amy's birthday yesterday (different Amy than last time). Happy birthday (yesterday) Amy.
I hope you had a good day.

I don't know if you'll get a chance to read this, Amy, but I'm going to write it anyways:

I want you to know that I've been thinking about you. A lot.
I've been thinking about you at least one hundred times more than I've been praying for you. And, I'm sorry for that. I forget to pray for you, and sometimes I just don't really want to pray. I'm sorry that my prayer life is defective and inconsistent.

I really truly am sorry, and I do love you. For real.

From,
Nadine J. Muis

Friday, June 06, 2008

a newfangled stream of words

I really don't like being told that I am similar to other people, no matter how much I admire that person.

I just want to look and act like me.

point form lists

  • It's Friday today. That is only one [of many] good reason[s] to rejoice (this fact in itself is reason to rejoice).
  • It's also summertime!
  • I got a haircut. AND, I like my haircut. [Except that I have to learn how to do it properly...]
  • I started my French assignment...it's due next week and it's enormous.
  • Tomorrow is going to be a fun day, I think. Yeah, definitely of the Fun Variety.
  • I actually got some sleep last night. Not much, but it was much needed and therefore, much more appreciated.
  • I have four more days of classes, then four exams, and after that, I will never again be a student at Guido de Bres Christian High School.
  • It was Lisa and Amy's birthday yesterday. Happy Birthday [yesterday] Amy and Lisa!
  • [not so much a cause for rejoicing, but oh well] I still miss people, even though I saw them just yesterday night.

Tuesday, June 03, 2008

ondule! ondule!

plod plod plod plod


picture my sister.........ohhohohohoaoaoihadaahaachortledjalgagakkbnkajfb
(such emissions continue to occur)

It's just too funny, I can't even continue.

Monday, June 02, 2008

Miste' Fossy, I've been thinking...


this, clearly, is the gerbera which catherine yvonne hordyk purchased for me at the campfire! pants & plants evening. it's quite lovely.





[the name pants & plants is courtsey of daniel muis and sarah vanpopta]





also. i have discovered some things slash i have learned some things slash i am in the process of discovering some things slash i am in the process of learning some things.

  • there are certain people with whom i feel very comfortable driving (even at very high velocities)
  • it's good to admit that you're nervous even to someone whom you wouldn't normally tell
  • i like to sing. but mostly when no one else is listening because then i feel comfortable "belting it out"
  • sometimes, sadness is refreshing, as odd as that may sound
  • there are some amazing people in this world that i'm just finding out about, some i've gone to school with for several years, some i've just met, some i've known for my whole life, some i've known for their whole life, most i haven't met yet
  • it's fun to play mario kart, even if you're not good at it
  • living worship remains one of my favourite activities
  • i like to laugh. loudly, clearly, obnoxiously, contagiously
  • i'm very easily distracted and excited. and i like it
  • God has a plan for me. and i don't [need to] know what it is
  • i miss people more than i thought. or more than i planned to
  • i also miss people less than i thought. or less than i planned to
  • my bedroom makes me feel welcome and at home
  • my family is pretty dang cool
  • sometimes i enjoy writing without capitalization, even though i'm breaking the rules of grammar
  • i like to bake. cookies, cakes, cinnamon buns, bread, things that are pleasant to eat, sometimes things that aren't pleasant to eat just to say that i made a mistake and then i chuckle to myself
  • i like relationships with people. real relationships. even if i sometimes show minimal efforts and therefore also minimal results
  • watching things is interesting. wind, spiders, people, flowers, insects, grass, cars, rocks, the sun
  • listening to things is sometimes better, but not always. cars, trucks, birds, wind, leaves, music, voices in song or in speech, trees, the sun
  • i like to hope that people aren't afraid to tell me when i'm being a jerk or when i'm doing something stupid. i like to hope that.
  • i like revelation 22:7-21 and 1 timothy 4

Friday, May 30, 2008

la laitue est savoureuse

Lettuce has very satisfying crunches when one eats it.

The sound makes it taste better which, as you know, is incredible because it's already amazingly tasty.


P.S. If you haven't eaten lettuce by itself in up to four days, I recommend that you go and eat some now.

P.P.S. Pickles acheive a similar effect, but with a garlic & dill taste.

Thursday, May 29, 2008

that sounds like a pretty crucial conjunction

It feels like my heart hurts real bad.
.
But, my inquisitive self says that it is impossible for my heart to hurt.
It says that my head hurts.
.
Sometimes I really don't like my inquisitive self.

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

punch

Sometimes I just want to nnngnahngakakghqilekgnadvcnmkbjvkaew.
Punch something.

You know?

I Asked the LORD

I asked the Lord that I might grow,
In faith and love and every grace,
Might more of His salvation know,
And seek more earnestly His face.

T'was He who taught me thus to pray,
And He I trust has answered prayer.
But it has been in such a way,
As almost drove me to despair.

I hoped that in some favored hour,
At once He'd answer my request.
And by His love's constraining power,
Subdue my sins and give me rest.

Instead of this, He made me feel,
The hidden evils of my heart.
And let the angry powers of hell,
Assault my soul in every part.

Yea, more with His own hand, He seemed,
Intent to aggravate my woe.
Crossed all the fair designs I schemed,
Cast out my feelings, laid me low.

"Lord, why is this?" I trembling cried.
Wilt Thou pursue Thy worm to death?"
"T'is in this way" the Lord replied,
"I answer prayer for grace and strength."

"These inward trials I employ,
From self, and pride, to set thee free;
And break thy schemes of earthly joy,
That thou mayest seek thy all in Me."

Written by John Newton

Monday, May 26, 2008

shattered

Why is it that the love of a three year old is so pure when compared to the love of an eighteen year old?



imagine the greatest cry of frustration, anger, indignation, and disbelief and place it here

cucumbers. they rock my world. except they taste gross.

The Water Buffalo Song
Veggie Tales.
Woot.

Thursday, May 22, 2008

"sometimes it's hard to see it"













I realized again that the eye is real neat.


brilliant green of fresh cut grass
pale tan of reeds, thrusting themselves out of
deep, rippling blue waters
hazy figures through tinted glass
white trilliums opening, a shock amidst a sea of
brown and green undergrowth
rosy, damp cheeks after rainfall
burnt orange of kubota competing with the
brilliant green of john deere
water droplets emerging, spreading from the fountain
flashing brake lights approaching a
clashing red sign
white lines growing as you draw near
square bricks, edges rounded
cold, hard grey stretches before, until at a curve,
warmth and greenery replaces the grey
colourless dripping pounds the ground
vibrant yellow for protection of
wires stretched taut
bright blue plymouth
lengthening shadows travelling further down
softly darkening beaches
twigs intertwine
charcoal leather Bible placed lovingly beside a
bare foot girl sitting atop an
old, decaying park bench
blue spruce next to the
purpling schubert chokecherry
truck turning in, signifying daddy's home
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...
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ornate golden streets leading to the
piercing majesty of the King

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Oh the wonders of being a mother

"sausage?"
[sploosh]

..."whoops"

yay soccer.

Thanks for coming out, girls. :]

By girls, I of course mean Brittni, Kira, Carol-Lee, Justine, and Julia.

I s'pose I should include Ben.
Thanks for coming out, Ben. [you're special, you get a mention all to yourself!]

Anyways, thanks for coming out and hanging out. I missed you. For some, it had been a long time.


Let's get together again soon, okay?
Maybe for a walk this time?
Or another soccer game... hehehe

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

flawless, ...

...I wish I was.




Also, I'm not a fan of pink.

Monday, May 19, 2008

my beautiful cat


Cat, peeping.
Peeping Tom.
Tom Cruise.
Cruise line.
Line dance.
Dance music.
Music note.
Note well.
Well water.
Water drop.
Droplet.
Let it be.
Be a man.
Man power.
Powerpoint.
Point blank.
Blank tile.
Tile design.
Design school.
School work.
Work ethic.
Ethically wrong.
Wrong way.
Way back.
Back home.
Home renovation.
Renovation costs.
Costs a ton.
Ton of bricks.
Bricks of stone.
Stone cold.
Cold feet.
Feet warmer=cat.

Sunday, May 18, 2008

it's got potential

new template?

it's got tea on it :]

Friday, May 16, 2008

blargh

SO bummed.

Also, watch this.
It's quite humourous and is making me feel better.

Thursday, May 15, 2008

excited, nervous, and scared

shh, it's a secret.
breeeeathe

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

to Carol-Lee

Thank you for the unexpected visit.
Thank you for talking and making me talk too.
Thank you for prayers together.
Thank you for devos(I should start that again...sorry).
Thank you for encouragement.
Thank you for quoting Bible passages to/with(mostly to) me.
Thank you for being able to sit with me and not say a word and still managing to make me feel comforted.
Thank you for laughing hysterically with me.
Thank you for being able to be serious.
Thank you for finally being able to look me in the eyes and not laugh.

To sum up, thanks for friendship.

I always feel like I have to say so many words to make people understand where I'm coming from. Many big, intelligent-sounding words make me feel more adequate somehow. But after I say them, it makes me feel superfluous, lame, and fake. I'm sorry I feel like I have to sound intelligent and use big words to make you understand.

Yeah. I love you Carol-Lee. I hope you know that.

From Nadine


To: whoever introduced me to Carol-Lee,
Thanks.
From, Nadine

Sunday, May 11, 2008

are you?

Are you running?


Are you running and getting somewhere?


Are you running with the zeal of an Olympic athlete?


Are you running in the right direction?




If you answered "no" to any or all of these questions you could be suffering from a severe lack of spiritual guidance. Contact your pastor today to find out the full implications behind these symptoms.

Thursday, May 08, 2008

roses

don't block them out.


be reasonable.


I don't know how!

Tuesday, May 06, 2008

I am currently trying to ignore the mound of homework awaiting me at the foot of the stairs.







Québec.











walking, learning, bonding, singing, losing sunglasses and finding them, ice cream, église reformée du québec, running up stairs, night life, wind, touring, Fluxx, pictures, peanut butter and jam on a sesame seed bagel every morning, water, cruise, funiculaire as a result of fatigue(or laziness), beaucoup de shopping, posing, cobblestone, smiling, running across the highway(scariest thing in the world), laughing, Mafia, musique, Francais, friendships, speaking, listening, "C'est bon!", hanging out, sleeping in the middle of the floor(beaucoup), creperie, MacPoulet, saxophonist(same as last Québec trip!), meeting the youth of the church, extraterrestrials, cabane à sucre, "Keep your eyes on Jesus", bag lunch, poutine(ew), un écoliare(school bus), ordering in French, driving, hiding from the camera(Cameron!), crying, having fun, learning about the people in French class and getting to know them better.

Monday, April 28, 2008

no humour

"they love you, you know."

Sunday, April 27, 2008

it was a-MA-zing

Have I ever told you how much I like my shoes?







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Well, maybe I should have.

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I probably or (in my common speech) I prolly like them a whole lot more than I should.
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A house. It has an unusual number.

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This is a saxophonist. :)
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>.

A lamp. Under a bridge.
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Julia made a pie. It was lemon-meringue.

Four in a row.
Java Jack's. Note the cinnamon bun.

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Chateau Frontenac. It looks real nice all lit up.


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>
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They warned us after we got off the ferry.
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It was a really big axe.
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I'm glad I took this picture. Even though there isn't anything special looking through the hole.






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A doorway. To darkness?

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A chair. We didn't sit on it, just in case.
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Kira was anticipating what I would look like with purple hair.
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God is Love.
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Airplane food. Blegh.
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Fasten seat belt while seated.
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I was seated. My seat belt wasn't fastened. Oh dear!
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Superman saved me. Yay superman!
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A door. It's old.
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SFN! Or Sven.
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It says Julia.
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The door had a man painted on it. He was upside down.
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The staircase was spiral and dark.
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An arachnid! Isn't it beautiful?
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My cat was sitting on a window sill, highly unimpressed.
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Christopher and I went walking along a beach once.

Friday, April 25, 2008

that's me, pale and pallid

"You've got sort of a white, pasty type face, dont'cha?"


Thanks, Dad.

Thursday, April 24, 2008

Woo, sign me up for the next war.


For all the Physics buffs out there.
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Post Script: This one's going on my wall. ;)
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Post Post Script: I posted twice in less than two hours...how sad is that?

well, this is news to me

Apparently I no longer have a say in my weekend plans.

It's all up to Christopher and Carol-Lee.

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

she's going.

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I was praying, I am praying, I will be praying.

Monday, April 21, 2008

Friday, April 18, 2008

Be my rock of refuge, to which I can always go; give the command to save me, for you are my rock and my fortress.

I was outside today. I wore a green shirt and jean shorts and bare feet.

I went on the swing and I listened to Brave Saint Saturn. For quite some time.

It was swell.



Thanks God, for the sunny day, even though I wanted it to rain.







P.S. Mom made jam!

Thursday, April 17, 2008

aaaaaaand...Go!

One two LUNGE!
Three four LUNGE!
One two LUNGE!
Three four LUNGE!
and repeat.


I did lunges today.

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

HUZZAH!

Huzzah!

One day, I shall inform you of the meaning of this amazing, mind-blowing, absurd, inconceivable, astonishing, and several other intense adjectives word.


I just love it, the way it tastes.



Post Script : Huzzah for the Alcatraz of Ponchos (it is now an official title).

Monday, April 14, 2008

the Alcatraz of ponchos.

those are the worst kind.

Sunday, April 13, 2008

Is it wicked when you smile even though you feel like crying, even though you could be sick at any time?

Is it wicked not to care when they say that you're mistaken thinking hopes and lots of dreams that aren't there?
Is it wicked not to care when you've wasted many hours talking endlessly to anyone that's there?

I know the truth awaits me but still I hesitate because of fear.

Skipping tickets making rhymes, is that all that you believe in?
Wearing rags to make you pretty by design, rusting armour for effect, it's not fun to watch the rust grow for it will all be over when you're dead.

Counting acts and clutching thoughts by the river where the moss grows over rocks the water running all the time.
Is it wicked when you smile even though you feel like crying, even though you could be sick at any time?

But if there was a sequel, would you love me as an equal?
Would you love me till I'm dead?

If there was a sequel, would you love me like an equal?
Would you love me till I'm dead?

And if there was a sequel would you love me as an equal?
Would you love me till I'm dead?


Or is there someone else instead?
Written by Belle and Sebastian

Friday, April 11, 2008

(I just posted on here but I am ridiculously excited)


SOUP FOR SUPPER!


One more thing, my alarm clock isn't broken...
[I dropped it and the battery fell out..........
and I reinstalled the battery backwards.]
.
Romans 16:20
.

Thursday, April 10, 2008

My alarm clock broke. It could quite possibly have been my fault.

Monday, April 07, 2008

Huzzah







It's done!












I'm happy.














Yay!

















Me. And the bag. And the button!
















Get a load of that button!

















I'm excited.














After a stern scolding, I have decided to add this.
I would like to thank Christopher Muis. He was my camera man. And commander. He was all hardcore about the camera angles and back light and such. Ergo, if the pictures are horrible, it's Christopher's fault. But, also, if the pictures are wonderful it's Christopher's fault. In my limited experience, the pictures are wonderful, and I'm fully prepared to take on anyone who thinks otherwise.


Better, Christopher?
arglesmarf


and a bottle of rum to boot

Saturday, April 05, 2008

blueberry pie and ice cream

Sometimes, when I am bummed out, I drink milk so as to feel it run down my throat. Sometimes, it makes me feel satisfied.


It didn't work this time.

Thursday, April 03, 2008

ROAR

just thought I'd put that out there

"What's going on in your head is important because that is where decisions are made."

"It is only logical that you would want to read the Bible because in the Bible you hear the voice of the One who loves you."

"Does the Holy Spirit work only when you want it to? Remember that the Devil is working as well, so even if you particularly wish the Spirit to work, it doesn't mean that it is successful because the Devil could be allowed to overpower the Spirit at that time."

"We all participate in the church, we all have our own role."

"You have a chance to participate in learning from God's Word, in teaching about God's Word, and in hearing God speak through His Word."

"You can always participate, no matter what your age. You just need to have your eyes open, your heart open."

"Jesus Christ takes care of His congregation."

We are not even close to perfect, to how God designed us to be.

Wednesday, April 02, 2008

*tingly feeling*

Hello, this is Nadine Muis calling...
*male voice* Hi! How are you?
I'm good, how are you?
GREAT!
That's good. Umm, I'm representing the Grade twelve French class from Guido. (etc.)
Well, I'll have to turn you over to the boss! Just a moment.
Umm, okay.
Hello, who am I speaking to?
Hi, this is Nadine Muis...
*female voice* Hello! How are you?
I'm good, how are you?
I'm GREAT. What can I do for you?
Umm, I'm representing the Grade twelve French class from Guido. (etc.)




I've discovered that there are very jolly, kind people in this world.

Tuesday, April 01, 2008

I wish I could roar like a lion.

Sunday, March 30, 2008

interesting "conversations"

an expanded metaphor from a "conversation"


I always want to have everything 'in my own hands'. Everything has to be organized in my head. I am set on the idea that I am the only one capable of opening the lock to the office of my mind. I think I have the option of hiding papers on issues I don't want to think about. I like to be able to ignore certain things, to dump them in the wastebasket which, incidentally, is overflowing, because my waste basket never gets emptied. I think God likes to poke His finger in my alphabetized files, in my cabinets, in my drawers, in my waste basket and fling the papers He finds all over in the office of my mind. Just so He can see my cells scurrying around picking up papers and trying to find a way to stop it from happening again. And then He tells me that I don't need all the file folders, cabinets, drawers, and (especially) waste basket that take up so much space in my office. He tells me that He is my file folder, He is the place where I should place all my cares and all my worries and all my thoughts. He tells me that all I need in my office is a single paper that says, "I love you, Lord, and I lift my voice to worship you." But, my cells don't react to His unspoken words. They continue to act at MY command, they continue to stack and re-stack again and again so that I can feel I am in control. And God pokes His finger again, scattering papers, and I clap my hands and order my cells about, re-organizing, trying to build a better structure, laying paperweights everywhere in an effort to stop this invisible, unstoppable finger. Never realizing that no amount of paperweights can keep my thoughts in order.



Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God, trust also in me. John 14:1
Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. 1 Peter 5:7
Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go. Joshua 1:9
So, whether we live or die, we belong to the LORD. Romans 14:8
The LORD your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing. Zephaniah 3:17
Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid. John 14:27